Rethinking The Coach/Athlete Relationship
Last week, I was talking with one of the newest athletes on my roster. He’s a very smart dude but a fairly new lifter, so we’ve spent a good amount of time establishing expectations for a coach/athlete relationship. I want to share part of that discussion with you, because frankly, I think most coaches overlook this aspect of their job completely — and it’s important.
The Role of the Coach
Many lifters think of a coach as a GPS of sorts: their job is, ostensibly, to give you directions so that you eventually reach goals. This is a terrible take, for two reasons.
First, as cliche as it sounds, lifting really is a journey and not a destination. Imagine you’re taking an epic road trip across the country. If you’re constantly staring at your GPS while you’re on the road, you’re going to miss out on a lot of the experience that comes with a road trip. In fact, it kind of defeats the purpose entirely; you might as well have taken a plane instead of driving.
Second, if you’re always following your GPS everywhere, you’re never really learning to navigate for yourself. I’m guilty of this; I use my GPS even when I’m headed to the grocery store — and as a result, I’m literally lost without it.
It’s the same with lifting. If all your coach gives you is a spreadsheet with a laundry list of sets, reps, and weights each week, you’re probably going to get bored pretty quickly. Worse, you’re going to become completely dependent on that spreadsheet. If you decide to one day work with a new coach, or coach yourself, you’ll have to start over from square one.
Instead of thinking of a coach as a GPS, think of them as a Jedi master (yes, I know this is corny, but it’s a good analogy). Remember the scene in Star Wars where Obi-Wan tells Luke to turn off his tracking system during the attack on the Death Star? That’s what a good coach does: they give just enough guidance to get you headed down the path to success, and then they push you to lean into your instincts. If you start to drift off course a bit, they give you a gentle nudge (sometimes a not-so-gentle nudge, or even a full-blown shove) to get you back on track.
The Role of the Lifter
Okay, let’s switch gears and look at things from the lifter’s perspective. I’m sticking with the GPS/Star Wars analogy, because it’s easy to understand and it’s accurate. Most lifters think of themselves as being in the driver’s seat — they’re in control, and all they want from a coach is direction. However, as I explained above, that’s a very limiting attitude.
If your goal is to become the best lifter you can be — to maximize your genetic potential — you need to shift gears (pun intended) and see yourself as Luke Skywalker. This is important for two reasons. Luke is the hero of the story, and you need to be your own hero and have confidence in your abilities if you’re ever going to succeed.
At the same time, remember that for the majority of Star Wars (well, the original trilogy, anyway), Luke was pretty much a screwup who got really lucky a few times. He had to spend quite a while getting his butt kicked before he became a Jedi. Think back to the scene in the Dagobah swamp, where Yoda’s putting Luke through his paces and all Luke does is whine and doubt himself. The metaphorical swamp is where most lifters fail: they hit a plateau, progress stops, they get mired down, insisting that they’re giving 100% effort, but ultimately fall victim to their own doubts and insecurities.
Your task, as a lifter, is to realize that your training is going to suck some of the time. It’s going to be hard, boring, frustrating, and seemingly fruitless. Despite that, you must continue to maintain a positive attitude and give 100% effort so that you can fulfill your role as the hero of your own story.
Trust Is Essential
The Jedi coaching philosophy requires much more effort from both the lifter and the coach than the GPS version. It’s not enough for a coach to copy and paste a laundry list of exercises from week to week (in fact, in my opinion, it’s enormously unethical to do so). Nor is it enough for an athlete to go through the motions and check off the list items each week. That’s obvious.
What’s less obvious is the need for trust and communication in the coach-athlete relationship. Without trust and communication, even the most dedicated athletes are going to feel lost and overwhelmed at times; and even the most skilled coaches will lack the information they need to plan effectively. When effort, trust, and communication do come together, the results are spectacular.
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